My journey with alcohol was like being on a boat with no compass. At first, it was smooth sailing – drinks with friends, a few laughs, the usual stuff. But before I knew it, I was lost at sea, with alcohol steering the ship.
I just woke up one morning, feeling like death (as was the norm back then). I dragged myself to the bathroom my dingy apartment and I realized I didn’t even recognize the person looking back at me in the mirror. That guy was a stranger, a shadow of who I used to be.
That was the moment, you know? I decided I had to change course. The best way to get sober? It’s different for everyone, but for me, it started with admitting I had a problem. I said it out loud, to myself, in that empty room. “Miles, you’re an alcoholic.” Sounds simple, but it was like climbing a mountain.
The next step was asking for help. I reached out to my sister, Jamie. She’d always been the level-headed one. I called her up, voice shaking, and said, “Jamie, I need help.” That call, man, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
Jamie was my rock. She helped me find a local support group. Walking into that first meeting was like stepping into a new world. I was a mess – nervous, ashamed, you name it. But the folks there, they got it. They’d been in the same boat, and they didn’t judge. They just wanted to help.
Sobriety’s not a straight line. It’s more like a series of waves – some days you ride high, some days you crash. There were times I almost went back to my old ways. But I’d think about Jamie, the people in my group, and how far I’d come. I couldn’t let them, or myself, down.
One thing that really helped was finding new hobbies. I took up hiking. There’s something about being out in nature, you know? The trees, the trails, the fresh air – it clears your head. Made me realize there’s more to life than sitting in a dark room with a bottle.
It’s been two years now. Two years of ups and downs, of learning and growing. I won’t say I’ve got it all figured out. But what I do have is a renewed sense of self. I look in the mirror, and I see Miles – the real Miles, not the shadow.
If you’re out there, struggling to find your way back, here’s my advice: Start with honesty. Be real with yourself. Then find your support – family, friends, a group, anyone who’s got your back. And finally, discover something that gives you peace, something that’s just for you.
Sobriety, it’s more than just quitting drinking. It’s about finding who you are without the alcohol. It’s tough, sure. But let me tell you, it’s worth every step.
Miles Bautista (Nanaimo, Canada)
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